Dear Sisters in Christ,
When I first wanted to start wanting to write this blog series in September, I came to a realization. I came to understand that I didn't fully understand these fruits as well as I thought. Patience was one of the ones I was definitely a little more uncertain on.
When I began doing a word study on Patience, what I found was that in certain translations, like the NKJV, Patience was not really the best word for every place it appeared.
Patience is often translated from two different Greek terms: Hypomone (Hi-po-moh-nay) and Makrothymia (Mack-Ro-Thigh-Mee-Uh). Hypomone means to be steadfast, to persevere, to have endurance, and to be unwavering in one's faith regardless of circumstances. I will do an article on Hypomone at another time.
However, the one discussed in Galatians 5:22-23, Makrothymia, refers to being slow to anger, to wait out having anger, or to be without an angered reaction to something.
Patience as a Fruit of the Spirit, means that we are gracious to others. It means that we are careful not to display rage or say hurtful things to others out of anger. This does not mean that we cannot express when something has hurt or upset us; but we cannot be rude, hateful, act in a rage, or maliciously make fun of another person. (Psalm 37:8, Proverbs 15:1, Ephesians 4:26, Colossians 3:8)
That cashier who messes up your order? Smile at them, and tell them that you understand that it was an honest mistake, but that you would still like for it to be fixed. You can request something be corrected without being ugly. You meet someone who is not a Christian and doesn't understand you? Don't belittle them for not understanding you. Simply say that you understand that in their shoes, you could see how the way you live might not make sense to them. Don't lash out and judge them for it.
You get the idea. Patience isn't the act of letting someone walk all over you. It is the act of taking a breath and realizing that none of us are perfect, and extending grace to our fellow man. How patient has God been with you, dear sister?
Every one of us has things in our own lives that we struggle with. We have bad days, highs and lows; yet, God is still here with us, holding our hands and leading us to better tomorrows. (Psalm 103:8.)
If you happen to act in a way that doesn't display the patience of God, admit that you absolutely did not act like Jesus in that moment. Apologize to the person, if possible. (Side note: Parents need to be better about admitting when they don't respond in a Christ-like manner to their children.) Ask God for forgiveness; then resolve to do better. Acknowledge those triggers that lead you to lose your temper. Then, have a plan in place, and pray, to help you escape the temptation in the future to lash out. God always provides a way. Believe it and look for it. (1 Corinthians 10:13.)
We don't always know someone's full story. We don't always know if they have had a bad day, or if they are struggling and overwhelmed. When people are struggling with mental health problems, grieving a loss, or just going through a trauma, people may behave in ways they might not normally. They may become more absentminded and make really dumb mistakes.
I knew a lady a few years ago who had experienced a great loss. A relatively short time afterwards, she had said something careless to me. When she realized what she had said in that moment, you could see on her face she felt very regretful and embarrassed.
I've been there. I know how clouded and heavy your mind can get when you are overwhelmed by things going on. And, knowing how tender-hearted this lady is, I know she sincerely didn't mean anything rude or hurtful. This incident also got me thinking.
How would have I reacted if I hadn't known what was occurring with her? It was humbling, and good food for thought.
You don't always know. God knows. People around us are hurting everyday, and in so many ways.When someone makes a mistake, does something ridiculous, wrong, or does something less than loving, this is where patience needs to come in. We don't know a person's story like God does.
Be patient and gracious. Smile and offer compassion. Be slow to speak, and quick to listen (James 1:19.)
And, I know we joke about it a lot, but don't be afraid to ask for more patience. Granted, you will probably be put in a lot of frustrating situations, but you will grow. It's a tough pill to swallow, but you cannot grow unless you are uncomfortable. It isn't easy, but it always leads to good things.
Love,
Chelsea
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